My First Time | Hampton Roads Personal Blog

Hi!

It's 8 days in to the new year and with all the holiday's and family time and irregularity of my schedule I realized it's been way too long since I wrote a personal blog post to you all! (almost three weeks too long, in fact! In case it's been too long to remember my latest personal post can be found here.) So I started thinking about what I could write about and what was going on with me that anyone would want to hear about. It hit me that maybe what you wanted to hear about was a little less on my mind than what I NEED to get out into the universe. So here goes...

 

You see, over the holiday's (right before we left for Christmas, actually)we learned that my husband's car is... how do I put this gently... on its way out. :(

 

The day before we were set to leave to see family for Christmas my husband took his 16 YEAR OLD Honda to get an oil change. That's how these things always start you see.... it's something normal, and every day, and nothing unusual and then BAM they tell you that you need $1200 worth of repairs or you have to give up your first born or something dramatic like that. The catch here was that back in July/August my husband's car needed $1,000 in repairs and at that time I made the FATAL MISTAKE of saying "Ok, we'll fix it this time but if it needs another large repair like this I think it's time to just buy a new car."

 

WORDS. OF. DEATH!

 

So here we are, 4 months later, and I'm eating my words.

 

Dislike.dislike.dislike.dislike.dislike.

 

The realization that we will be buying a new car triggered some MAJOR ANXIETY in me- anxiety I haven't felt since ooooh maybe my wedding day? Haha Yes, it was that momentous of a feeling for me. We haven't had a car payment in a number of years- since college, I think- and to be honest with you I have NEVER purchased a car in my life. My first, and only, and CURRENT car was my grandfathers and was handed down to me when he passed. So to think about 1. Financing a car and even worse 2. PICKING a car felt like just too much for me.

 

Picking my husband was easy. There was no choice in my eyes- he simply is and was the man for me. No question (some anxiety, sure, but weddings and marriage hold a lot of pressure and that's a lot to put on yourself...but I digress). But buying a car? PICKING a car?! There's a bagillion and two options out there and once you narrow down which KIND you want (SUV vs. sedan vs. GIANT TRUCK) you then have to choose which size you want. Four doors? Two doors? Butt warmers (totally want those, by the way!)? Navigation? Chrome wheels? V6? V8? (Who even knows what those mean???) Mid-size SUV? Giant, take-the-whole-soccer-team-to-tryouts SUV?

 

The. Options. Are. ENDLESS.

 

And, at least for me, that's completely nerve-wracking. I don't know enough about the car world or car parts to truly understand everything I'm looking at and that makes me nervous. Nervous because when talking to a sales person I don't know enough- I'm not knowledgeable enough- to refute or agree with what they're telling me. So I'm not a fan of this whole process.

 

My husband loves it. John is all for researching and all for going for test drives and all for ME being a part of the process. We've already been to two dealers and we're nowhere near finished. Don't get me wrong: I absolutely appreciate that John wants me to be a part of it and wants me to be involved in this big decision but let's face it: I am not a fan of this! Haha

 

So, if anyone has any SUV's they LOVE (yes, we've at least determined we're headed in the SUV direction) and absolutely would encourage their mother to buy, let me know! And even more important: if you see me out at one of the 1,000 dealerships in the Hampton Roads area, STOP BY AND SAVE ME!

 

Wish me luck!
Best,
Sarah

p.s. I'm sorry, for some reason the internet doesn't want to let me post a picture with this blog today :( So lots of pictures next time!

We Might Not Have Kids | Hampton Roads Personal

Hi.

 John and I have been married for over two years now and all around us friends and cousins and friends of friends and cousins of friends etc. are having kids. Some are having that magically exciting first baby and some are having that incredibly blessed 2nd or 3rd or 4th child. And, like asking "how are you" when you see someone on the street, we, as newlyweds, always get asked "when are you having kids?" We get asked together, we get asked individually, and even our families get asked.

It's a natural progression right? First comes love...then comes marriage...then comes... Sarah with a Yorkie in a sweater?! Well that doesn't seem quite right ;)

People are not being rude when they ask it. It's a natural question like asking if you want a drink with your meal: when will you have kids?

But here's the truth that shocks almost everyone who asks: WE MIGHT NOT HAVE KIDS.

 The answer we always give in some form or other to the question of "having children": we're not sure yet and frankly we haven't decided yet if we are going to have them at all.  Most folks try really hard to avoid the next question but without fail it finds its way out: But WHY?! Why wouldn't you have kids? How could you not want them? Or how could you just not have them?

 I always giggle a little at this point because by now I know it's coming and it's almost as if I'm a mind reader (which is why i laugh).

 But here's the truth: We're selfish. We really really enjoy taking trips together and buying each other useless ridiculous things (like the tablet John bought me for my birthday or the drum heads I'm buying him for his birthday). We like to be able to go out to dinner or take an overnight to Cape Charles at the drop of a hat simply because we "feel like it." We like being lazy and simply not doing laundry or going grocery shopping today because we're tired (definitely can't be neglectful with a kid to care for). We like building our life together as a DUO. And the whole truth? We're still figuring each other and this whole "marriage thing" out.

 We haven't completely counted out the possibility of children and frankly I know deep down that knowing (or believing) I have that choice is extremely important to me. I like being in a place in life to choose if right now is the time I want to bring a child in to our world.

 Being a mother is a LOT of pressure. Raising someone and having only yourself to blame for their upbringing and their well-being is super scary to me! I don't want to mess that up! I SINCERELY and HUGELY applaud all moms and dads out there- serious kudos and props and applause and encouragement to you for taking on that incredible and selfless life choice- I am truly humbled by you.

 But we're simply not there yet. We're selfish. I've said it. You can say it too-- it won't hurt my feelings if you feel that way based on our choice. But I'm happy I know that about me- happy I know that about us- happy WE know that about us. John and I are fortunately on the same page with this and maybe one day... in 3 or 4 or 5 years we'll have turned a few pages and found ourselves on the chapter entitled "Our Crazy Beautiful Life with Kids." Or maybe we'll never find ourselves at that chapter- I simply don't know right now (sometimes we joke about getting to be the cool aunt and uncle who spoil our nieces and nephews).

 But until then I fully intend to continue to enjoy our life as a duo (with Charlie Dog in tow) and appreciate the beautiful, patient, loving, supportive, and amazing man I get to call my husband- a man I get to learn more about each day I wake up next to him.

 I hope to one day be "ready" to raise a child (however ready someone can be for that) but today is not that day. And for now... I'm happy with that.

Best,
Sarah